Why Your Relationships Are More Important Than Money

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I recently embarked on a 1,000-mile road trip and was elated with the string of consciousness I experienced. My road trip afforded me a full 8 hours (each way) of solitude. Yep, it was just me, my cheesy 80s/90s music, and my thoughts.

During my drive, I noticed a recurring theme. I noticed just how much I thought about my varying relationships over the years and just how much I enjoyed the people that have come in and out of my life…and those who have stayed. After much reflection and enjoyment, I realized something I already knew on some level – relationships are way more important than money. I’m assuming you agree, so let’s talk about it.

The Default Setting

A wise professor once told me that our thoughts will automatically default to our relationships if we’re not being distracted by outside stimuli. Based on my experience, he was right.

Ironically, that same professor eventually became one of my most trusted friends and even officiated my wedding to Mr. MMM.

Almost immediately upon starting my long trip, I realized just how many people were popping into my thoughts. I thought about people I hadn’t thought about in years. I remembered conversations I had eons ago and even caught myself laughing out loud.

Suddenly, I was remembering holiday gatherings as a child, dates I had with my college boyfriend, and personal dramas I shared with only my closest friends.

It was sobering to also realize that I am the sum total of my experiences (good and bad) – and so are you.

I was truly experiencing what my good friend had stated so many years ago. My thoughts automatically drifted to my relationships when given free reign. And it was wonderful.

Time Is Limited And A Precious Commodity

According to an 80-year-long study conducted by Harvard, “good friends protected people from mental and physical decline, and gave a better idea of how long someone’s life will be than their social class, IQ or genes.” Tell me that isn’t a powerful statement. Whoa.

The older I get, the more I realize how quickly time passes. I realize that days turn into years and years turn into decades almost overnight.

The Power Of Strong Bonds

In my world, I feel a sense of security because I have strong bonds with many people. I mean let’s face it, when a crisis strikes, I’m not going to log onto my online banking app for solace. Instead, the first thing I’m going to do is call a trusted family member or friend to talk through the situation. I have in fact used this strategy many times throughout my life with great success.

Case in point, when I was younger our house caught on fire and was destroyed while we were away for the day. The first thing I did when we got notified by the fire department was call my friends for assurance that everything was going to work out and be okay.

Granted, I was in college so I wasn’t responsible for replacing our belongings via savings and insurance, but I’m fairly certain I would react the same way today if faced with such a crisis.

This memory of that experience is a reminder that the people we have strong bonds with are the people that have a wonderful way of making us feel like everything is going to be just fine when faced with a less than ideal situation.

Money Is Just A Tool 

Of course, I’m not advocating that money isn’t important at all. Obviously, I think money is extremely important and needs to be at the forefront of planning and decision-making. However, after your financial systems are in place to meet your goals, money just becomes a tool to live a less stressful and more satisfying life.

I was listening to a podcast the other day and heard the host say that you can only do 3 things with money – spend it, save it, and give it. I guess that is a true statement.

Let’s break it down:

• Spend It

  Spending money can give us great pleasure when we’re spending it on things and people that we value. I find that I often get way more enjoyment out of spending money on other people than I do myself. I have also noticed that spending money on experiences gives me lasting memories that I cherish – like our Disney vacation we took a couple of years ago. It’s a stark difference from the way I operated in my early 20’s, but in my opinion, it’s a positive change.

  Thought Experiment: Imagine spending money on an unforgettable vacation to the destination of your choice with someone you love. Those memories would last a lifetime and be worth every penny.

• Save It

  Saving money can be a bit boring which is probably why a large chunk of people have a difficult time doing it. However, saving money leads to financial stability. And when you’re financially stable, you have one less thing to worry about.

  Whether you’re running a business using restaurant payroll software to keep track of your budgeting and expenses, or you put all gift money or other earnings into a high-yield savings account, saving will make a massive difference in your future. 

  Thought Experiment: Imagine you’re sitting there reading this with $1M or more invested. I’m no psychic, but I’m willing to bet you’d feel a lot more secure and maybe even enjoy having more life options.

• Give It

  Giving money is one of its best uses. Giving money allows you to give an opportunity to someone who wouldn’t otherwise have a choice.

  Thought Experiment: Imagine you were able to save up enough money to help your son, daughter, niece, or nephew attend their dream school for college or technical training. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say you wouldn’t regret it.

Related content:

• Advice From Your Future Self About Life And Money
• How To Transform Your Money At Any Age
• How To Keep Your Friends If You’re Frugal
• My Mama Always Told Me – You Better Have Your Own Money

Sometimes I catch myself tracking our net worth almost incessantly. When this happens – and it happens more than I’d like to admit – I like to take a moment to catch my breath and remind myself that our bottom line doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of our lives.

What matters is that we have enough money to live comfortably and to enjoy each other and everyone else we choose to accept into our lives.

What Matters In The End

What really matters, in the end, is that you live a fulfilling life with the people you value the most. Those experiences and memories will mean just as much, if not more, to the next generation than the money you leave behind.

Do you agree that relationships are more important than money? We’d love to hear from you in the comments.